I'm starting off the new year with a new website!! It's at:
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!
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The beast was among them...dressed as one of them..and it was hungry.
The newlyweds were flushed with excitement. They had painstakingly planned every detail of the reception....the perfect flowers...the perfect band...gourmet dinner...special dances...the......toasts...
It wouldn't be long now. It had been too long since the thing had fed. The unsuspecting victims were just now enjoying the salad course. Soon the thing would eat too. Only one thing would satisfy its insatiable appetite...time. And lots of it. It was just waiting for its cue...
..."and now ladies and gentlemen...a special toast from the Best Man..."
SUPPER TIME!!
The timeline was dead.
Fiction? Unfortunately in too many cases, no. I always remember a "toast" being something along the lines of "over the teeth and through the gums, look out tummy, here it comes!"..but too often a well-wishing Best Man or Maid of Honor sees this custom as their 15 minutes of fame - literally...15 minutes.
One question I always like to ask clients is "what is your goal for this reception"? Most people say that they want their guests to have a great time, to stay and dance and make the event one people have great memories of. In short, they want to throw a great party.
So why do so many people seem to forget what makes a great party?
True, a wedding reception is not an ordinary party...but there are some ingredients for successful parties that are universal, no matter what the occasion. One of those ingredients is the ability for the hosts to take the focus off themselves and put it onto their guests. This may seem contradictory to the very reason this event is happening in the first place- to celebrate the new union of the two most important people in the room. But the happy couple is THE reason everyone is there in the first place and the big white, fluffy dress is a big clue as to who the center of attention is. Making 200 guests - who have already dedicated an entire day to celebrating the rookie-weds - continue to sit through long speeches and toasts to further drive the point home can be the very definition of overkill.
And it can kill your timeline.
The bride and groom are most likely not going to be aware of what time it is - or rather, how much time they're losing - at any given point of the reception. Nor should they. But the band the bar and the bus boys definitely know what time it is. That's our job as planners and bandleaders and DJ's - to keep things moving and on schedule. And ready or not at the end of the night, the party is going to come to a close. Hopefully by this point it's your guest's feet that are tired from dancing and not their rear ends from sitting all night. You've probably paid good money for the band or DJ. You should get the most out of your investment and let them do what they do best..fill the dance floor. I've seen more than a few brides with that surprised look as though the dancing just started, and it seems we're "already" thanking the audience and going into our last dance.
Besides, wedding toasts are kind of like inside jokes - filled with memories that approximately 2% (according to statistics I just made up for this blog post) of the entire crowd were involved in and thus, care about. Making guests endure long winded speeches about things they weren't involved in is kind of like inviting friends over to sit through a slide show of your last trip to the Grand Canyon.
Don't forget the show business aspect of throwing a party. Appeal to the larger audience. More elements that everyone can enjoy - like dancing, eating and drinking - can help ensure a fun reception.
None of this is to suggest toasts should be done away with. But if brides and grooms make it clear to their respective Best Men and Maids of Honor from the very beginning of the planning process that their timeline is limited, things can move more swiftly to the true business of partying. A brief toast can still be funny, congratulatory and heartfelt.
And the time-eating beast will have to eat elsewhere.
Geoff Short
Geoff is the Sales and Promotions Manager at Jerry Bruno Productions and is the bandleader of JBP’s band The Avenue. Contact him at geoff@jerrybruno.com.
THE AVENUE – from Jerry Bruno Productions
Seated: (l. to r.) Tiffany Marchak (Vocals), Geoffrey Short (Vocals), Leigh Peterson (Vocals
Back Row: (l.to r.) Ray Porello (Drums), L.R. Smith (Keyboards), Ian Indorf (Trumpet), Joe Blues (Guitar), Bob Kessler (Bass), Chris Vollstadt (Saxophone), B.J. Bishop (Trombone).
Dear (insert special event name) Client,
We musicians realize that much like Dickens' ghost of Marley we carry the chains forged from decades of bad reputations for not showing up or showing up late and then raping and pillaging your entire shindig. We also realize that this negative stereotype makes your parting with your balance check BEFORE the gig about as likely as head table place settings for the rhythm section. But could YOU realize that at midnight after an entire day of revelry and all the Jack and Coke that goes with it, you're probably not in any frame of mind to deal with important financial transactions like making sure the band actually gets paid for services rendered?
Let me explain. In many cases where musical entertainment is contracted, a NON-REFUNDABLE deposit (don't even get me started on this oft-ignored policy) is required ahead of time to reserve the act for your event. Most of the time this deposit is 50% of the total due, with the other half due the night of the event. Fine. This first half of the transaction usually occurs on a weekday when everyone is sober. Don't get me wrong. All of us in the industry are grateful you've contracted our services. But here's hoping that more fathers of the bride and other special event benefactors realize that after a gig, we're sweaty, tired and just want to get paid, pack up our gear and head to bed. The challenge for many beleaguered band leaders and DJ's is actually collecting that balance check in a timely fashion once the lights come up at the end of the night. It's hard enough finding you among the remaining guests, probably interrupting whatever slurry conversation you might be in and holding our hand out like Oliver Twist asking for "more". Here are a few classic examples that can make it even harder (you know who you are!):
The Scribbler - Once you actually locate him after 20 minutes, this is the completely snockered dad who can barely hold his checkbook and a pen at the same time. Often the bandleader will politely stand before The Scribbler for an extended period of time while he goes through an inordinate amount of checks, screwing each one up worse than the other. The upside down check....the check where he accidentally writes the same profanity he is speaking...the check he fell asleep in the middle of writing. In the end you usually get a crumpled, damp piece of paper made out to: "Je78XXX7s Prkdd#@# F**CK!"
The Socialite - This is the mother of the bride or similar player who gets that classic look of "What? We owe you money?" look in her eyes upon your approach. She then proceeds to tell you to "follow her", and like a compensation-starved puppy you are on her tail throughout the entire reception. Of course, making a bee line to the source of the money would be too much to ask, so naturally she stops at every group of relatives for another extended conversation-the bandleader at her side like a personal valet. By the third or fourth stop to chat, she has completely forgotten who you are and where she was going in the first place and finally asks you to go get her another drink.
The Concierge - This is the would-be payer who left his checkbook up in the hotel room. This is easily a half-hour wait and you know once he finally gets up there, he forgot to get the keycard to the room from his wife.
The Hot Potato - This tactic is usually committed by a group of relatives who must be a joy to dine out with once the check comes because their paying-avoidance skills are honed to perfection. These are the folks who deflect you like running backs and refer you to another player like the best man who they think was in charge of disbursing checks...of course Best Man looks at you like you have three heads and you get passed off to Cousin Vinnie....Vinnie to Aunt Fannie..Fannie to...well, you get the picture. By the time this merry-go-round stops it's 3 am and you're looking at the busboy wondering if the tips in his pocket would be enough to cover the balance.
So...how to avoid this frustration? Take care of all the business transactions before the reception starts. Organize and write your vendor checks ahead of time and pass them out. Get it out of the way. We totally understand that paying before the party starts makes you nervous. But rest assured, we didn't spend the last three hours to set up a full ten-piece band and complete sound system only to dine and dash. We're there, we're staying and you will get the great entertainment you imagined. The artists at companies with reputations like Jerry Bruno Productions are consummate professionals who only want the best for you and for you to continue referring us to your friends and families. We've grown up from our wanna-be rock star days of raping and pillaging your gentile events. So pay up...early. You'll have a happy and content band and you can party 'til you puke! You'll be safe and we won't have to incur the wrath of a drunken Aunt Fannie. Check please.
Sincerely,
Geoff Short (aka Oliver Twist)
Geoff is the Sales and Promotions Manager at Jerry Bruno Productions and is the bandleader of JBP's band The Avenue. Contact him at geoff@jerrybruno.com.
THE AVENUE - from Jerry Bruno Productions
Seated: (l. to r.) Tiffany Marchak (Vocals), Geoffrey Short (Vocals), Leigh Peterson (Vocals
Back Row: (l.to r.) Ray Porello (Drums), L.R. Smith (Keyboards), Ian Indorf (Trumpet), Joe Blues (Guitar), Bob Kessler (Bass), Chris Vollstadt (Saxophone), B.J. Bishop (Trombone).
Don't get me wrong, 99% of the weddings we perform at are gorgeous, classy affairs that are painstakingly planned. From the band perspective, all of us at JBP work very closely with clients, planners, venues and other vendors to make sure we guide the reception smoothly through its timeline. But the recurrence of a certain amusing--if not downright awkward--nuptial phenomenon never ceases to amaze...usually starting with the first dance.
The first rule of planning a wedding reception is that there are no rules; whatever the newlyweds like is what should happen. But it's always been my understanding that the first dance should be one of the most romantic moments of the big day. A few minutes that not only christen the dance floor, but that also give a new husband and wife the chance to hold each other and reflect with one another on having just started this new part of their lives together - all while listening to one of their favorite songs. It's almost a private moment really. The most moving and romantic first dances I've seen are usually handled this way. And then there are the others...
You know the ones: the dance school flunkies, who despite weeks of bargain wedding dance class lessons still look like they're in a boxing match as opposed to a first dance. And why is it always the grooms with the absolute worst rhythm in the world who seem to be forced into this choreographic conundrum? It never fails that instead of a lump in my throat I have to fight the giggles at the look of absolute terror on his face and the look of sympathetic frustration on hers as she is relentlessly counting to four through pursed lips. Rather than a beautiful moment of wedded bliss, these fumblings resemble the awkward prep school dance classes we were forced into as kids.
On behalf of dance schools everywhere, dance classes are great things and fun to do together as a couple. But a first dance is not a variety show. You don't have to entertain your guests - yet. Newlyweds, do yourself a favor. Just hold each other and thank your lucky stars you've just married this prince or princess of your dreams. You should remember this moment as one of joy and love in each others' arms - not one in which you'd rather be anywhere else than having to remember which is your left foot and which is your right. The genuine look of being in love on both your faces will entertain the crowd way more than any spin or dip. And your future kids will never look through your wedding album asking why daddy was sweating and looked like he had to go potty.
-Geoff Short
Geoff is the Sales and Promotions Manager at Jerry Bruno Productions and is the bandleader of JBP's band The Avenue. Contact him at geoff@jerrybruno.com.
THE AVENUE - from Jerry Bruno Productions
Seated: (l. to r.) Tiffany Marchak (Vocals), Geoffrey Short (Vocals), Leigh Peterson (Vocals
Back Row: (l.to r.) Ray Porello (Drums), L.R. Smith (Keyboards), Ian Indorf (Trumpet), Joe Blues (Guitar), Bob Kessler (Bass), Chris Vollstadt (Saxophone), B.J. Bishop (Trombone).
This is my Director's note for the production program for "Oklahoma!" I'm directing at Huntington Playhouse this Summer:
“There’s a bright golden haze on the meadow…”
How we take these lyrics - the first ever submitted to Richard Rodgers by his new Lyricist partner Oscar Hammerstein II - for granted! But the pure artistry in these and so many other lyrics and melodies from Rodgers and Hammerstein cannot be denied. The images those 8 words immediately conjure are indelible and undeniable. And therein lies the joy and the challenge of Directing this great American classic.
I am so glad to have had this opportunity to Direct "Oklahoma!" It really is one of those shows that just feels right, like an ice cold beer on a hot Summer day. It really is true that the more things change the more they stay the same and here we are again - just as we were when Oklahoma opened on Broadway in 1943 - in challenging, troubling times. And just as it did then, this first collaboration between Rodgers and Hammerstein comforts audiences and reminds us of the sheer joy and pride of being home, making a home and coming home to America.
But as is the case for every theater producing a classic play or musical, the challenge is to breathe some new life into the piece while remaining true to what people love about it. Every comfortable, old home needs a fresh coat of paint once in a while. Or, in the case of Oklahoma!, in my opinion, it needs its usually bright, shiny coat of paint weathered and aged a bit. Green Grow the Lilacs, the Lynn Riggs 1931 play on which Oklahoma! Is based takes place in 1900 – less than a decade before Oklahoma even became a state – in what was known as “The Indian Territory”. This was land set aside for Native American tribes forcefully relocated there by the government on The Trail of Tears, but soon the government opened the territory up to white settlement as well. And it is those new settlers that are the heroes of ”Oklahoma!”. These people would have been unglamorous, hearty people of the Earth, trying to settle in a somewhat hostile environment. I have never subscribed to the usual portrayal of these characters as fresh-faced cowboys and cowgirls in clean prairie dresses and matching, multi-colored kerchiefs. I have also never understood why there was never any mention of Native Americans in any of the Oklahoma text or the play on which it was based. Certainly Indian tribes had a strong presence in the area (as did African-Americans) and would have had some influence over the culture of the land and its new white inhabitants. They certainly have with this production and so wisps of Native American memories sometimes float throughout this production along side the lovable – if not so freshly scrubbed – characters and gorgeous music we have all loved for so long. I hope you like it.
My thanks as always to Tom and everyone at Huntington. And to the incredible cast and crew – especially my partners Kira Seaton, Alex Tepe, David Glowe and Keith Stevens, thank you from the bottom of my heart. What a clambake! I love you all. But most importantly I send my love and gratitude to my wife Lisa and my Daughters Mikey and Bailey. I Love you as big as the sky!
"My favorite part happens just before the first minute mark. That's when guy #3 joins the group. Before him, it was just a crazy dancing guy and then maybe one other crazy guy. But it's guy #3 who made it a movement.
Initiators are rare indeed, but it's scary to be the leader. Guy #3 is rare too, but it's a lot less scary and just as important. Guy #49 is irrelevant. No bravery points for being part of the mob.
We need more guy #3s."
Thanks Seth!